Photo: Emily Long; Gap Store Front NYC
My favorite celebrity/mentor, Oprah, once said “In order to live life to the fullest and REALLY start living, you must find yourself first” …or something like that. On my journey to finding myself, I found it all. My love, my life, my purpose.
101 Management – that’s us. Yes, my husband and I work together. 12 hours a day, seven days a week. He does his thing and I do mine. We are questioned all the time – it’s hard for people to accept that our system works, but it does. He is the master of all things music, and I am the expert on all things internet. If I have a question about Jay Z, I ask him. If he has a question about keywords, he asks me. And if there is a decision to be made about a keyword for Jay Z well then we simply turn around in our chairs to discuss it. What a novel idea.
Some may say we’re still in our honeymoon phase, but I say we’re just smart and know our boundaries. I don’t pretend to know who shot Biggie, and he doesn’t pretend to know Google’s algorithm. He is the more prepared, intelligent, established and personable of the two of us. He knows exactly who he is and lives his life to the fullest, never having given in to corporate America, and still making his way to the top in his own little music world. I had always strived to be more like him, until one day when I realized I was already there.
I know a lot about online marketing. I realized this one day recently, much to my surprise. I pinky swear it happened just like that. It was the day after returning from my honeymoon. Clearly it was the tan and St Lucian motto that did it: “No pressure, No problem mon”. My husband must have told me a thousand times, but I just didn’t see it. Or maybe I had to see it for myself. I had been blindfolded by an unethical, narcissistic boss for 6 years, and just couldn’t see my own worth. I kept everything I learned through those years hidden in my jeans pocket, waiting for someone else to do the laundry and pull it out for me. I was afraid of failure. Then my Scorpio, type A, controlling personality decided I had enough. It was time to grow up, do the laundry, and fight my insecurities. And believe me, there are a lot of insecurities in there. I guess the seven years of modeling could have been part of it. Rarely seeing pictures of yourself that haven’t been Photoshopped will make anyone crazy.
That day when I realized I’m damn good at what I do was really the first day of the rest of my life. I can make your website show up on the first page of a Google search, create and send one hell of an email that would sell dog socks, make your Facebook page more interesting than Game of Thrones, and establish your brand online to the extent that even your Grandmother will hear about it at her next hair appointment. I do things that matter for businesses, and I’m proud of that. I now have a purpose in my life. I wake up every day ready to work because I work to make my life better. I wake up ready to love because I’m loving life. It’s much more than fighting insecurities now, it’s about REALLY living life to the fullest now that I’ve found myself. I could thank Oprah for that, but unfortunately I don’t see her on the daily anymore. I guess I’ll just chalk this one up to Emi Melker.