Photo: Emily Long
This is not OKCupid. It’s not Match.com. It certainly isn’t Eharmony. And it’s definitely not Plenty of Fish. This. Is. Tinder.
Call it take-out dating if you will, window shopping even, but Tinder is the quickest way to size up your attraction to the little thumbnail of a picture on your iPhone. Swipe to the left if you’re not interested. Swipe to the right if you are ready for a potential match. It’s that simple. No 300 question interrogation. No novel to read about a persons likes/dislikes. No complexity. Just yes or no. If you both swipe to the right- congrats! It’s a match and you’ve given each other free reign to contact each other… If you’ve got the cajones to initiate conversation, that is.
Alright, so I may or may not Tinder on the beltway during extremely heavy traffic (not recommended). Maybe in the club. Or at the bar. Maybe even while running in 100 degree weather. So what if I had a breakdown when my screen went black. Or when my Tinder told me there were no new people in my area. It was as if I went through the whole deck of cards. But alas, I wake up in the morning and there IS a Tinder-god and a whole new set of fresh faces. This is just not your typical online dating scene.
Even better, Tinder has recently launched the app for Android users. Now, I’m an avid and loyal Apple customer, but ladies… consider this an expansion of your portfolio. Besides the application being available to users outside of your iPhone, another creative way to increase your Tinder options (your Tinder database or Tinder inventory, respectively), is to travel. Yes, you can Tinder while abroad. You can have Tinder’s in different area codes. Hell, you can start your own real life “The Bachelorette.”
“Tinder me this” I recite to myself as I load my app with excitement, I find myself having conversations with Tinder: “Gosh, I thought I already got this guy.” “How am I supposed to figure out which one he is in a picture of 10 other dudes!?” “Is he REALLY cheers-ing someone with his left hand, wedding band totally apparent.” “He’s not 25, he’s 13.” “He’s not 25, he’s 42.” “Is that really a picture of his pelvic area?” “Is he really on a donkey?”
Out to dinner with girlfriends who cannot Tinder for themselves (and to prove to them I am not insane for having conversations with my app), I hand them my phone and watch them amuse themselves with the amount of Tindering that could actually happen over an appetizer and a full meal. Fast forward to dessert, and they find themselves actually messaging back and forth with my Tinder matches about our whereabouts for our next adventures that evening. You might like to say, this is how my committed girlfriends vicariously live through my single life.
Some look to Tinder to develop meaningful conversations with someone they find instantly attractive. Some go to Tinder to find a quick link to a dinner date. And yes, some even go to Tinder to find that instantaneous hook up. So a little advice for my fellow Tinderellas: Tinder the way you want. Tinder how much you want. For as long as you want. In any angle you want.
So what are you waiting for? You know you’ve asked yourself: to Tinder or not to Tinder?
I say Tinder.
Just don’t drinder (that’s short for drinking and tindering). You just may find yourself in an awkward situation that even the savviest Tinerella would have a hard time navigating.